Category Archives: All 3
Aging: Words of Wisdom from the Last Woman Standing
The smile you can see a mile away
Rant:
Aging: Words of wisdom from the last woman standing…
Yep, that’s my 98-year-old Mom. As of two weeks ago, she lost her last friend. All of her family is gone too. Just writing the above sentences makes me want to breathe in a bag! My way of saying that my heart is beating faster and I can feel myself begin to hyperventilate. How does she stay positive and upbeat? She wears a smile you can see a mile away. What has she learned that has helped her navigate this not so great part of the aging process?
Rave:
Aging: Words of wisdom from the last woman standing…
I have asked Mom how she deals with loss and dramatic changes. First of all, she says, she learned a long time ago that nothing stays the same and has embraced that idea wholeheartedly. I can relate. “Nothing stays the same” has become my mantra of late. Secondly, Mom does have Linda and me, and many of you have children that you hope will take care of you until the end of your life. According to Mom, don’t count on it. It’s a harsh reality that some kids don’t take care of their parents or find it difficult because their lives are full.
Mom says, she “has always felt loved” and because of that, she can love, not only others but herself. Consequently, she is perfectly fine with her own company. And therein lies the key for me. I have struggled with self-love my whole life. Realizing Mom’s scenario may be mine someday, I’m inspired by her to finally let that struggle go.
Attitude:
Aging: Words of wisdom from the last woman standing…
What can we learn from this 98-year-old who has lost family, a daughter and all of her friends? Lots.
Mom’s self-love playbook:
Move on
Mom is not a saint! She does get sad. She does cry. I have cried with her and I have held her while she’s cried. However, she does not dwell there. We usually end up laughing and she moves on.
Gratitude
Every day Mom says out loud, “Thank you for my life.”
Curiosity
She asks people questions about their lives and really listens to their answers. She stays engaged.
Take care of yourself
Mom walks every day, 3 times around her parking lot holding on to her walker, 3 times a day! It’s a mile total.
She eats 1/2 of what is on her plate.
She dresses casually but beautifully every day.
She wears a big smile.
Self-talk
“Hi, Mom”, I say when I call. “How are you?” “WONDERFUL” is always her first response. My sister Linda and I call ‘wonderful’ a mantra.
Her other mantra is, “I have to see people.” (She has an aide that is with her 6 days a week for 5 hours per day who drives her to her favorite restaurant daily for breakfast. I tell her she’s like Norm on the sitcom Cheers. “Everybody knows her name!”)
Laughs often
Mom giggles at things she says. She said to me, “If you’re coming to visit an old lady, she doesn’t live here anymore!” and bursts out laughing.
I hope we are surrounded by love until age 110! May we find love from others but most importantly, may we create our own self-love playbooks and by doing so, inspire others to do the same.
Originally posted 2018-08-04 18:02:12.
Three Reasons to Revive Your Inner Boomer
Rave
We won’t be stereotyped: Kudos to Senior Planet: In an on-line article, dated 12/28/2013, they wrote: 12 Things You’ll Regret When You’re Old(er). Number 8 is ‘Letting yourself be defined by cultural expectations. Like the expectation that we’ll fade into the background as we get older.’ I would like to add the words ‘society’s expectations’ as well. Whether we marched, burned draft cards, got married, lived in communes, burned bras, or started a job, we had opinions on a variety of subjects and we did express them then and will continue to do so.
Rant
We rebel: In December 2013, I attended a panel discussion at a prestigious PR firm on the subject of marketing to baby boomers. I thought, “Great, the marketing world is finally getting it.” Hanging around the room were posters depicting gray-haired men and women dressed in subdued conservative clothing. Black, white, Asian, it didn’t matter-everything was gray! Later, there was a film presentation and with one lone exception, again all gray-hair and subdued colors. I asked the panelists, “Who created your promotional pieces for today? I’m a 66 year-old woman and not all the boomers I know look alike, nor do they all look like the people you have in your video and posters.” The response from the creative team was that they had gone to their clip art library and that’s all they had. I know beautiful women and handsome men with gray or white hair, however not all of us are gray, nor are our lives and that’s the rant. I believe these stereotypes wrongly put us in categories with very strict boundaries. Let’s not allow a ‘clip art’ world to define who we are. Boomers and boundaries? I don’t think so!
Attitudes
We are aware: Here we are finding our voice once again. The movement is quieter. We are talking among ourselves, more likely, over a glass of wine than a psychedelic drug. It’s the women leading the battle this time. I believe boomer men think the same, but seem happy to let us take the lead on this war. We still have flower power, it’s just ground up in the latest ‘anti-aging’ products the PR firms are trying to sell us.
I’m not planning on this blog being only about Boomers. I realize reaching any age milestone can be scary. What all of us can refuse to do is allow age milestones or society’s misguided beliefs make us lose our identity.
That is what I love about my 94 (on Feb.2nd) year old Mom. She has a clear definition of who she is and has never allowed other people’s beliefs or societal stereotypes limit her.
Mom two weeks ago
These are a few of the words I use to define who I am: Colorful, happy, energetic, involved, athletic, contributor, a blogger.
What are some of the words you would use to define you? Tell me.
Originally posted 2014-01-22 17:57:36.