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Category Archives: Rant

When “Do As I Say” becomes “Do As I Do”

May 14, 2017

http://www.nextavenue.org  re-posted this piece once again, originally written in 2015 in honor of Mother’s Day and my mom.

Their title: My Mother, My Inspiration…

 Rant:

You remember the phrase our parents used to say, “Do as I say, not as I do?”  Here are some “Do as I say” edicts spoken by my Mother:

-Sit up straight.

-Walk looking up, not down at your feet. (My sister Linda stepped on a nail when she tried that!)

-Your face is going to freeze like that.

-Don’t talk to strangers.

-Yes you are going with me to so and so’s house.  Why? Because I said so.

-Go to school.  If you still feel sick in a few hours, call me.

-Play nice with others.  Treat them as you want to be treated.

-Put on lipstick.  You never know who you are going to meet.

 Rave:

There were 25 people at Mom’s 95th birthday February 2nd. It was a joyous, energized and eclectic occasion filled with relatives and friends, old and young, gay and straight, black and white. People couldn’t wait to hug and kiss her and tell stories about where they met and how she inspires them.

Linda and I are in the most enviable position of being able to focus, and change, the second half of the phrase ‘Do as I say, not as I do.’ We now tell ourselves, as we navigate through our lives, ‘do as she does’ .

 

 Attitude:

I bet some people look at Mom’s wonderful smile and her ‘in the moment’ energy and think, “Wow, this woman has had an easy, happy life.” From loosing both her parents by the age of 12, raising three children with no child support, to the loss of one of her daughters, how wrong they would be.

Author Vivian Greene wrote: “Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass. It’s about learning how to dance in the rain.”

This is how Mom chooses to dance:

-By not putting herself down, beating herself up or saying negative things that demean who she is.

-By never saying, ‘why me?’

-By accepting that “this is the way life is.”

-By recognizing the good in others and treating everyone as an individual.  She still tells Linda and me not to speak to    strangers, but she never meets a stranger. It doesn’t matter if it is a clerk in a store or the person in the auto detailing shop, the first thing she’ll ask is their name.

-By never forgetting about the little girl who lives within her. She brings her out to play. When I called the other night, she told me she was watching a ‘penguin movie’ and could not talk.  She failed to hang up the phone properly so I was able to listen to her laugh, all by herself, while watching Happy Feet on TV.

-By repeating daily, “Some one up there is watching out for us and I’m so GRATEFUL.” Grateful being the optimum word.

-By getting out of her house and engaging in life. “I have to see people every day.”

-By saying, “Exercise. I notice one of the first things to go are your legs.”  Mom rides a stationary bike at a gym almost every day.

-By carrying herself with dignity and grace with her head held high. And I don’t remember her ever stepping on a nail!

-By putting her lipstick on before she walks out of the house!

 

Mom at 95, rocking those red lips and looking her elegant self

Mom at 95, rocking those red lips and looking her elegant self

 

Do what she does?  You bet. I’m learning how to dance in the rain.

One of my goals is to celebrate my 95th birthday, happy and healthy, with family and a group of eclectic friends, while wearing a brilliant shade of red lipstick!

How about you?

 

 

Intro: The Art of Being a Baby Boomer

May 4, 2017

Raves:

This blog is about empowering baby boomers, physically, emotionally and creatively.

Rants:

We were loud and proud in the heyday of the 50’s, 60’s and 70’s  It’s time we were again. This blog is also about breaking societal stereotypes on aging by bringing awareness to the forefront on who baby boomers are and who we are not.

Attitudes:

My desire is that you will join this conversation. Along with help from you and others, including a high-heeled, gym-going, red nail polish wearing, ribbon in her hair, 93 year old woman, who happens to be my Mom, we can share tips and ideas that will propel us forward, re-shaping our own thoughts and society’s ideas about us along the way.

 

Shoes 8

 

Stay tuned.  There is lots more to come…Soon!

Originally posted 2014-01-20 00:28:50.

10 Steps to Renewal at Any Age

May 4, 2017

Rant:

10 Steps to Renewal at any Age

Renewal, what a great word. I wonder if we stop thinking about renewal, OUR OWN, after a certain age?  Do you ever think about renewal and refreshing your life?

There is so much talk about meditation as a good way to refresh.  And I agree, if I could shut my swirling mind off for awhile! So, I wondered, what renews me?

 

Rave:

10 Steps to Renewal at any Age

Here are five of my personal favorites:

  •  April Fool’s Day.  One of my favorite days.  It’s right around the corner.  Why not think of something to do that will get a giggle out of you and whomever you ‘fool.’  I get Jake every year.  He hates bugs so at the right time I scream, “You have a spider crawling on you!” Then I stand back and watch him try to find the spider and get it off him!  It’s a riot.  Oh boy, I can’t wait! (Don’t tell him!!)
  • The Gotcha’ game.   Walk up to someone and say, “You have a spot on the front of your shirt.” When they look down to see where it is you take the side of your index finger and gently tap them on the underside of their nose and say, “Gotcha.” Ok, ok….I get it…But when was the last time you played that ‘Gotcha’?
  • Play board games.  Mexican Train is my favorite at the moment!
  • Call someone who loves you.  When I’m blue and need a virtual hug, I call my dear friends or family members just to say hello.  I usually don’t tell them I’m blue.  Just hearing their voices, their happiness because I called, grounds me and I’m all better.
  • Be Creative.  It can be the simplest thing. I have said before that Mom has the cutest little girl inside her.”Hi Mom,” I said when I called last week.  “Whatcha doin’?”  “I’m playing dress up in my closet.” Mother has always used her appearance as a form of creativity.  It’s one of the fun steps she takes that renews her . In the March 2017 O (Oprah) magazine, (which you can only view on-line if you pay for it-I bought it), is an article, on page 117, called: ‘Does Your Style Match Your Soul.’  It speaks to how clothes reflect who we are.

Mom’s certainly do:

One of Mom’s steps to renewal

Attitude:

10 Steps to Renewal at any Age

Here are 5 more:

  • Do something wonderful just for you.  A  friend said she always keeps her house and her car in great shape, now it is her turn.
  • Play.  Like you did when you were a kid.  How about Zip lining?  To watch one of my buddies run over a bridge and take a flying leap was priceless.  It was priceless because she was making the funniest sounds while doing it.  And right there her little girl showed up and so did everybody else’s kid!
  • Watch a Parade.  
    10 Paths to Renewal

    Alexandria’s St. Patty’s Day Parade

     

    Alexandria Virginia has 3 parades a year.  Military Bands, clown cars, dogs dressed up, kids, kids and more kids.  I laughed and giggled and waved and sang.  I searched Google: ‘How to find parades in your area.’  There were 85,700,000 results!!

  • Volunteer. Helping others is one of the best feelings in the world. Renewal at it’s finest.
  • LOL. Laugh out loud. I mean really out loud.  So loud that people will be looking at you wondering what’s so funny!

Please scroll down to Leave A Reply and share the steps you take. I know your reply will be appreciated by others. I will re-post this blog with your responses.

But before you do…you have a spot on the front of your shirt…GOTCHA’!

 

Originally posted 2017-03-09 21:12:08.

Age Perfect: What It Is and Isn’t!

May 4, 2017

Rant:

Age Perfect. What it is and Isn’t:

Madge Hardcastle played by Celia Imrie in The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel said:

“…I don’t want to grow older. I don’t want to be the first person they let off the plane in a hostage crisis.”

Ha!

Well one thing age perfect isn’t is wishing we were younger.  That seems quite obvious but is it?  Often we find ourselves in situations where the notion of wishing we were younger pops up. I totally get there are things about being younger that many of us wish for and with good reason! I asked my husband what he wished aging wasn’t.  Among other things, it was getting out of bed with the aches and pains! Very honestly for me, I wish that after the kids are gone and the job is over your libido came roaring back!!

The whole idea of wishing to be younger is not a comfortable one.  It isn’t for me.  I think to myself, “Knowing what I know now, wouldn’t it be fun to go back?” Then the reality hits, if I went back, I wouldn’t know what I know now!!  DUH!  It doesn’t work that way.

A baby shower was held for the owner of the gym my friend attends.  The conversation was about jobs, having children and material things.  My friend felt like she was back in high school being left out.  It was then she had an ‘aha’ moment: jobs, having children and things are not that important to her anymore.  She gravitated to a woman who was closer to her age. Consequently they had a lot in common.  No more feeling left out.

Rave:

 

Age Perfect.  What it is:

Vietnamese Buddhist monk Thich Nhat Hanh says:

Age perfect

Age Perfect

Attitude:

Age Perfect.  What it is:

The following article written by Jordi Lippe-McGraw, a millennial, recognized ‘age perfect’ when she saw it!  Don’t let the title fool you! It’s an empowering piece.  Please read it.

https://www.oyster.com/articles/54029-4-reasons-why-young-folks-should-go-on-an-old-people-cruise/

I’m adding to Jordi’s list of reasons we are a pretty great group of “old people”…

  • Acceptance of things we can not change frees us to ‘be where we are’
  • We honor the value of our experiences
  • Our focus on what is important changes from ‘things’ to relationships
  • Gratitude increases
  • We just don’t care that much what other people think of us

What does age perfect mean to you?  Let me know!

 

 

 

Originally posted 2016-07-04 18:21:02.